My weekend (and then some) as a single mom

WARNING: cat lady content ahead.

Well... It's Saturday night. I just got back from Snow White and the Huntsman (SO good!) and am watching Friends before bed. M is in Canada.. he left Friday at 5:30 in the morning with my dad and brother, and they're all holed up in the woods with a bunch of other guys until Wednesday night. 

My mom has PCAs staying round the clock, but my dad worries about Lucky's care/I'm not sure as a part of their "job" that they'll take care of pets. At least one other time when my dad left town they wouldn't watch Lucky. SO guess who gets the honor of watching him while Dad's away? this girl. Ordinarily I would love this. Lucky was "my" cat long before TJ came along. He's big, fluffy, and SO docile. He's NOT a snuggler though (which is what I love about TJ). BUT naturally, being away from home stresses him out. He's a bit more skittish, vocal, and sad. Which breaks my heart because I love him and I tell him all the time (yes I'm nuts) that he's going home in a few days... because in my world he's thinking I've taken him away from my dad, and honestly thinking about that makes me want to cry/has me tearing up. Yes, again, I'm nuts. 

Anyway, Lucky is 7. TJ is 11 months old and CRAZY. You do the math. I brought Lucky home late last night... and ordinarily when introducing cats (who will live together permanently) there's this long drawn out process of letting them sniff each other's belongings, letting them interact under a closed door, etc. Yes, I know these things. Anyway, I don't have time for that shit. In my perfect world, the cats would frolick and lay together, and angels would sing. WRONG. I bring in Lucky's crap last night and put it in the guest room. I give TJ a heads up sniff before bringing in Lucky's carrier. I bring in Lucky's carrier and let TJ sniff him through the bars. They'd met once before... when we first got TJ we were watching Lucky. I opened the doors and BAM: Lucky bolts under the bed, TJ follows, and Lucky makes noises I have NEVER heard him make... growls, hisses,...scary. TJ's eyes bug out and he's meowing (quite distressed) not taking his eyes off Lucky. fuckkkkk. 

I start panicking thinking if either of them hurt the other I'll have an upset man in my life (either M or my dad) so I get them apart, put TJ in his room, put Lucky in the guest room, and both just start HOWLING. I had a long, dumb Friday...8 hours of work, was exhausted from tuesday-thursday 12 hour days, had 3.5 hours of BarBri after work, and now these 2. I walked into the living room and burst into tears. It was at least an hour of ugly crying while watching Say Yes to the Dress:Bridesmaids. I go to bed puffy eyed.. Lucky's in his room (and mad) and TJ is roaming the house (which mostly entails sitting outside Lucky's room and sticking his paws under the door. Such a shit.) 

4:45 a.m., I hear "BANG BANG BANG". My heart is in my throat, 9-1-1 is punched into my phone, and I'm slowly walking downstairs (something I swore I'd never do if I REALLY thought there was an intruder, but I was 80% sure there wasn't one). Nope, just Lucky, knocking over picture frames and rattling the door because my dad is CRAZY and feeds him at 5:30 in the morning and Lucky was throwing a tantrum because he was hungry. 

Anyway, this is what today looked like when I tried to let them be in the same room: 

 Here's a close up of the bottom 2 frames. It LOOKS like TJ has his arm around Lucky and is telling him a story. In REALITY TJ was mid-"go for the throat"-lunge.

and another standoff (seconds before TJ swung that paw at Lucky's head)

Meanwhile, I'm trying to do this: 

(Make flash cards for the bar exam)

 Annnddd another attack by the back door. 

I finally put TJ away for a while and let Lucky roam around. Poor guy was exhausted from being assaulted by the 8-lb terror. 

SO, this is the next 5 days of my life. I have had a perpetual headache. My problem is I care too damn much. I've been rotating them in and out of their rooms, to give each a chance to roam the entire house, which means the one in their room at any given time hates me, and is howling. (although usually only about 10 minutes and then if I'm quiet enough they think I've left and they shut up). TJ is worse than Lucky. Although right now, TJ is in his room and he's whining, and Lucky's out in the open and HE won't.stop.grunting.

Having 2 strung out cats and having to play cat-roulette is stressing me the fuck out. I feel like I'm just upsetting both of them at all times..and that every time I let TJ out of his room and he smells Lucky all over, or put TJ away, that I'm "betraying him" because this is HIS house. omg, I KNOW how nuts I sound, but the whole thing is going to give me an ulcer. Not to mention, I like both of these cats independently because they're QUIET. I don't do well with vocal cats (aka cats that just meow ALL the time, for no reason)... TJ usually trills or purrs but it's sporadic and not annoying. Lucky never meows unless he's hungry. Neither one of them have shut up for the last 24 hours.

Pray for me, people. This is hyper dramatic of me, I realize.... but OMG these 2 are driving me crazy.

-Kelly

Friday's Letters

Linking up with Ashley at adventures of a newlywed, otherwise lord knows I won't be blogging. ugh.

Dear Friday, I wish you'd feel more like a Friday, but I'm already dreading 3.5 hours of Constitutional Law bar review lecture tonight (yes people, this is my life right now)

Dear BarBri (my Bar Review course), die. That's it.

Dear Baby TJ, I'm picking up your cousin Lucky tonight (my parents' cat), PLEASE play nice. mkay?

Dear 50 Shades Freed, I'm a-commin to buy you! Andddd I will read you by Monday.

Dear M, Have fun in Canada! Don't fall into the lake! Make sure my dad and brother don't fall in the lake! On second thought pleasedon'tgoi'llbeSOBORED. Just kidding. Haz fun!

Dear Bossman, maybe it's because you got the pins out of your finger (hey, like the lion with the thorn in his paw!) but you've been much cheerier lately. Keep it up.

Memorial Day Weekend (so far)

Well, the high from graduation didn't last long. BarBri started Monday (our bar review course). SO I had that 6 hours a day every day last week. Except Tuesday, when I skipped out early to take care of things at work, and Thursday, which was a "testing day" (I just took it at home)

Friday night M's dad and his girlfriend were on their way through the cities heading to Wisconsin, so we entertained them on the deck. 

Saturday we woke up to this: 

And that is what it did all. damn. day. SO, we did a lot of this: 

 (my neck scratches are paralyzing) 

 and some more of this. 

 and more of this. 

We then headed down into the bunker (the man cave) and I read 50 Shades of Grey (holllyyyy smutty) and TJ spent 90% of the night (from 6:00-midnight) right here:

He'd roll around, stomp off to explore, but for the most part stayed put. Except a short period when he hopped up to his throne to survey the land: 

 He LOVES the window up there, and it's always impressive to watch him make the leap from couch to window. I love watching him coil into a little spring and release.

Sunday (today) was sunny and in the 90s here. Oof. So what better way to beat the heat than to hit the water! We went to Independence Lake (near Maple Plain, for those familiar with the area), it's about 20 minutes from our house. M had done some research Friday and discovered you can rent a row boat for $4 for a half hour. So, we did just that. I'd be lying if I said things went PERFECTLY according to plan. We got the row boat, but M rowed it the wrong way out to where he wanted to fish (backwards), apparently neither of us are very knowledgeable rowers but you'd think we could've figured out to point the tip forward. He had some NASTY blisters on his hands too, because he went quite a ways away from the landing. He did this for 2 hours:

 While I did this: 

I posted on Instagram (kellybea14) that I had bought 50 Shades of Grey to see what all the fuss was about. Whoa nelly, the book delivers. Now, time for me to baby-rant. I saw some crap on Twitter from people saying things like "OMGOSH I can't believe THIS is bestselling fiction, it's not even written that well, and OMGOSH her name is ANASTASIA STEELE it's so cheesy, and OMGOSH it's so sexual!".... a) I don't think anybody ever claimed it was a Pulitzer piece, b) appreciate it for what it is. It's a smutty romance novel and lastly c) after buying it (knowing FULL WELL what it was about) and seeing "Erotic Romance" stamped on the back I sort of question who these people are who didn't know what it was going to be about. Alas, despite the raunchy sex scenes, there's something about the way it is written that DOES really draw you to these characters.. by 100 pages in, when she would see Christian Grey or talk to him and she described the way her heart lurched, I FELT it myself. Pretty intense. I'm starting Book #2 tonight! I also know I'm late to the party on these (although to be fair I feel like I HEARD of them pretty early... at least earlier than the Hunger Games which I still have not read) but the reason I wait/don't read them right away is precisely because of what happened yesterday: I bought the book at like 1:30, and finished it today by 2:00. I read 350 pages in 6 hours and the remainder in 2 today. I kind of feel the pressure to finish the 2nd one today/tomorrow so I can rip into the third one before BarBri gets too in depth. oof. And here M expressed concern that wedding planning would be the thing that causes me to fail the bar exam... nope. Just your run of the mill erotic novel.

My law school friend Dana (we'll just call her Dana from here on out, mkay?! On account we graduated and all) is coming over in an hour to grill. I can't get over the fact that we have another FULL DAY of nothing tomorrow. It's been a fantastically leisure-filled weekend.

P.s.: M's mom gave us an old trunk that we're thinking of using for a coffee table. Stay tuned for a before and after, once we paint it (likely tomorrow!)

-Kelly

Graduation

If it feels like I've fallen off the face of the earth lately, or in the coming weeks.. I haven't. But bear with me. I'll need to start drafting posts when I have free time and then post them throughout the week because between working 8-4 and BarBri (Bar exam review class) 6-9:30 I will not have much "lounge" time this summer!

That being said, I GRADUATED Sunday! What a surreal experience. It hasn't quite hit me I'm done and I get pangs of anxiety every once in a while and it takes me a moment to identify them as, "OMG I should be outlining or reading or writing a memo!" before it hits me that NO, I shouldn't. I'm done! Of course that is replaced with bar review and outlines.. alas.

Here are some photos from the weekend. Saturday we had my good friend Andrew's graduation picnic... these are most of my group of friends and their girlfriends. the guys from L-R are Tony, Andrew, Daryl and Kevin, and the girls are Julia (Andrew's gf), Hilary (Daryl's gf), myself and Dana. Julia is going to be a 2L at the U of M, and Hilary will be a 3L at WMCL.. so, all future lawyers!

M and I Everybody the morning of Graduation! From L-R the guys are Kevin, Daryl, Dustin, Andrew and Tony, and that's me, Dana, Sammi and Rochelle. Sammi is graduating in December, but she was marshalling the ceremony and came out for photos too. The guys had put their robes on to walk to school for photos and just left them on, for whatever reason. haha. We met up at the guys' house in the morning with everyones families to have brunch and then go to school to take photos. Organized by Dana. The girls! My handsome fiance, and myself. I feel like a 15th century artist or something in the getup. Ridiculous.In front of the schoolEverybody lookin' fancyPost-ceremony.. that's M, my grandma (my mom's mom, and the wife to my grandpa I've referenced several times on here), and my uncle Tom. I'm the fourth generation graduating from WMCL, and being a lawyer in general. I work for my uncle Tom's firm right now in downtown. My little big brother, and I. Dad, myself, little broand Dana and I. The day before orientation I bumped into and was told by a high school classmate that she had a college roommate who was going to the same school as I was and if I saw her to say hi. Well who do I sit by at orientation but that college roommate- Dana. We've been friends ever since, and she's going to be a bridesmaid in my wedding next year :). She's a party-planner extraordinaire and definitely made my law school experience way more enjoyable. Love her.

After Graduation we went to Mancini's with my family, M's mom and step-dad, aunts, uncles, cousins, family friends, and my friends, all in all there were about 28 of us. Everybody was SO kind and I felt SO loved... it really was one of the most special days of my life to date. I had a baby-depression set in Monday when I thought "it's over!?"... all that hype for graduation and then it just ENDS. haha. I can only imagine what the wedding blues will be like the day after that. Good thing I have some time before experiencing that ;-)

And that's that, from Graduation! Bar Review started yesterday.. they really waste no time getting down to it. I'm thinking I may start a wedding wednesday post.. something to keep me "regular".. because the days seem to escape me.

Hope you all had a great weekend too!

Friday's Letters

I figured this would be as good a way as ever to prompt my ass to write. SO I'm hopping on the bandwagon!

Dear Friday, hello, sexy. I've been waiting for you.

Dear Stomach, I hear you, man. But it's only 10:00. This is not a socially acceptable lunch hour. Can we wait until at LEAST 11:45?

Dear work, OY. so many motions. Why do you always get busy right before I'm out of the office? Also, ARE you going to hire me on after I take the bar? please? I'll stand on a street corner with a sign if that's what it takes to bring in my own clients. Srsly, though.

Dear metro area attorneys, I have many skillz. I am totally employable. Hire me please? I'm cute, I'm little, I don't take up much space, oh and as drunk-Cathy from SATC Movie said "and I can type like a MUTHAFUCKA," (and I have a lot of debt and OMGINEEDAJOBLIKESTAT)

Dear Como Lady, remember that one time you said you'd email me the contract? yesterday? lies. Would it pain you to email it to me today? pleez? thanks?

Dear TJ, sorry we haven't in any good snuggles lately. Momma's been busy. TONIGHT, I promise. (why yes TJ, I AM a crazy cat lady!)

We set the date!

After what feels like an eternity, but was really only 5 and a half weeks, M and I have set the date!

October 5, 2013

Weird to actually think we have a fixed point to work around. Was October our "ideal" month? No. M wanted June or September as top choices, July and August were 3rd and 4th.. we really hadn't even considered October, but when the one church in town with a 3:00 ceremony that you don't have to be members at (but must be an alum/family alum) has 4 openings between April and October (2 in April, 2 in October),... you work with what you have! We figured, MN weather in April is just as big a crapshoot as MN weather in October OR July for that matter. It could be snowing in April or October, and it could be storming in July. Besides, we're having everything indoors anyway (except cocktail hour, but it's under a covered patio) AND the first week in October is the BEST for fall colors. The trees all look like they're on fire. It's beautiful.

SO without further adieu, here is the church:

Really, it was the only church that worked with the times we wanted to have events, so it's an incredible perk that it just so happens to be BEAUTIFUL. Yes, this is a college campus chapel. The lawns out front (the "quad" if you will, at the University of St. Thomas) are perfectly manicured, as well. It's really amazing.

 The inside. :) The neurotic home decorator in me LOVES the blend of old school wooden pews, with the more modern looking white trimmed pillars and light yellow paint. I really don't think we need to do an ounce of decorating for the ceremony. Just let the church speak for itself.

I lurve it. It's so clean looking! OMG I need to stop gushing, but every time I look at it I squeal. I foresee many a drive-by in my future.

Next, guests will drive over to Como where they will have cocktail hour next to the flamingo and duck pond:

 It actually just occurred to me that the little guys may be hibernating by October... either way, it's a beautiful area, and all the foliage and water will still be there.

At 6:30, guests will go inside to the Covered Porch, overlooking the reflection pond where we will have a plated dinner. Again, beautiful room. I love the stone wall with uplighting. In our venue search I was looking for rooms that largely could stand on their own in terms of beauty. Even with these smaller centerpieces, the room looks phenomenal. (Fun fact: I'm wanting to do something very similar to this first centerpieces in the foreground: submerged sticks/silk flowers and a floating candle!)

 The view from outside. We'll also have a grassy area in front of this reflection pond with tables and chairs set up.

 AND as an added bonus, we get to rent the "bonsai lobby" and the "ferns of the world" rooms. The bonsai lobby, which I didn't even pay attention to when we toured, has a bunch of little bonsai trees in glass cases. Mostly, it'll be where we stick a bartender and/or our DJ- I'm still unsure about that. On one hand we can close the doors off so people can still talk in the main reception area, and nobody has to give up a table for the dance. On the other hand, I fear if the dance isn't in the "middle of everything" people may be less inclined to dance. We'll see. That was random. Anyway, we also get this room:

 There's a path that weaves all around the room as well as benches, and people can walk through here all night with drinks and food! SO even if it is a rainy garbage MN fall day, we get the "outdoor element" INDOORS. Best of both worlds, really.

The paranoid Type-A in me is having a mild-heart attack announcing we have the date already. Mostly because we've "reserved" the dates at both venues but haven't paid the deposits or signed the contracts. (Check is in the mail for one, and the contract is coming today for the other) and I know this is a formality and these dates ARE being reserved for us, but I have this fear that the woman at Como thought I said 2012 or something.. even though October 5 doesn't fall on a Saturday in 2012.. I'm just nuts, really.

So that's that! Very excited to start looking at photographers and DJs and crafting, now that I have a date to put on things! I must be getting back to my BFF today: the copy machine. [srsly. lawyers waste more paper than every other profession combined. I swear. One of the partners is in the middle of filing an appeal and he asked me to make a copy of EVERY motion filed in the case by any party- there are 4- put them in chronological order, and then create a spreadsheet of them with the page count. fun. The stack of copies will be no les than 3 feet tall when it's over. Closer to 4 probably. woof.]

-Kelly



Mother's Day

I have to start this post by saying I took absolutely zero photos on Mother's day. That'll happen though when it's your first time having your entire family over for a holiday and you're running around trying to get ready because they showed up 15 minutes early (in true form). Alas, thankfully my cousin Mark is a PHENOMENAL photographer (and is the photographer for the student newspaper over at Hamline where he goes to college), so I jacked these from his FB page. I take zero credit, but man did he sure make our humble little gathering look elegant!

He even took a snazzy picture of the front of our house in all its springtime glory. :-D

As I sit here in my office (procrastinating that pesky research) I will say my heart is so full (super cheesy line I would never ordinarily use...). This weekend was filled with law school friends on Saturday night, celebrating the fact that we made it through 3 years with (most) our sanity in tact. Sunday was spent with my mom's side of the family, as well as M's mom and step-dad. It made me SO happy seeing how perfectly they all got along, and how well M and his family fit in with mine. It's something that could be easily taken for granted, and I've heard the horror in-law stories, so to see everybody mingling and chatting (something NOBODY on this side of the family has any difficulty doing) was heartwarming. Makes me even more excited for our post-graduation dinner, which will contain a lot of these family members, M's mom and step-dad, as well as many others. (my dad CANNOT. stop. inviting people. Srsly. It went from 8 people at dinner who were coming to the ceremony to 27. I don't even know.)

NOW onto the photos!

 My uncle Tom and my littlest cousin Mitch on the steps.

 Max, Mitch's brother, says "talk to the hand."

 Max again!

 Pie. ohhhh the pie.

 M enjoying some pie. (There's a significantly less flattering photo of him with a mouthful of pie and sleepy eyes, but I chose this one. Don't say I never did anything nice for you, M.. ;-) ...)

 My little (bigger) brother. Have I mentioned I have a brother? Well yes. This is him. He's 21, graduating from college in December.

 This is Grandma Esther. She is in her 70s and dresses better than I do. It's embarassing, really. (Me not being able to dress myself, not her). Her husband was the grandpa that practiced law (that I mentioned in my Office Tour post) that passed away last February.

 Aunt Marie trying to feed Mitch.

annndd Grandma feeding Mitch. Both he and Max were more interested in screaming at the kitty who would pop into that window in the background. He was chilling in the office most the day. Between the food and the open doors he'd either have wound up eating everything in sight or escaping. Little guy was BEAT last night after visiting with so many people.

ANNDD yes, I am the world's worst daughter and took no photos of my own mom. AH, actually I do have one I took for the Instagram prompt "Day 13: mum" but forgot to email it to myself. Alas, mom was there and had a great time :)

That's it for now! Hoping to hear back from the church coordinator today so we can SET A DATE finally. oof. Hope you all had a great weekend as well!

-Kelly