#QUISTYSDIRTYTHIRTY

I heard on the radio not too long ago that the way to make a weekend feel longer is to actually DO more things over the course of the weekend. 

Not necessarily run yourself ragged, but having some plans can stretch those 2 and a half days. Not that I'm ever ready for Monday to roll around but I didn't dread it as much as some weeks. This weekend was SO great: full of tons of fun events and yet relaxing at the same time. This weekend was all about that guy I married, M! 

On Sunday, M turned 30, so I planned us a whole weekend of surprises. 

Friday night (not pictured) we went to dinner with his mom and step dad to kick off the festivities. 

Saturday morning we got up bright and early to hit the road to Surprise #1. I was concerned about the weather but thankfully the forecast proved true: overcast, but no morning rain, which was perfect for a morning of hiking at Taylors Falls. Taylors Falls is about 40 minutes straight north of Minneapolis/St. Paul, followed by another 20 minute straight east, until you hit the Minnesota/Wisconsin border. 

The only thing I was disappointed with was that the trails weren't LONGER. This was seriously the most beautiful trail I've ever seen (not that I've done a TON of hiking), but wow. I honestly felt like I was in Montana or somewhere significantly more rugged than a typically farm-area of Minnesota. 

After hiking we devoured lunch at Romayne's in town.. all that exercise worked up quite the appetite. 

We hopped in the car and made the long, rainy drive home to shower up and get ready for Surprises 3, 4, and 5. 

Surprises 3 and 4 were stops at 2 local breweries in town: 612 and Indeed (for you locals). M loves beer, and finding new beers, so I knew this was right up his alley. A selfless date-idea indeed for the girl who doesn't drink beer (and poo on 612 for having nothing besides water from a Culligan stand for us non-beer drinkers.. womp). Thankfully Indeed had flavored San Pellegrino. 

After encouraging him to nurse the second beer a bit longer (he slammed his beer at 612 in about 20 minutes.. I had allotted about an hour for each brewery.. haha.. I think he was just excited to keep the day rolling :)) we drove over to Surprise 5: Dinner at Hola Arepa. Ho-ly SNOT that was a fabulous dinner. For locals- Hola Arepa was (still is) a food truck during the week in downtown Minneapolis and they recently opened a restaurant on 35th and Nicollet. It was out of this world tasty. 

Surprise 5.5 was going to be dessert after a walk around Lake of the Isles, but we took home dessert from Friday night's dinner so we went home and scarfed that and watched The Wire instead. 

It's quite possible I was more excited about Sunday's surprise than Christmas morning, but first, Sunday morning. We woke up early and walked to the Caribou that's about 8 blocks from our house, where we sipped coffee on the patio and split a lemon poppyseed bread. 

By the time we got home and showered I knew Surprise 6 was close. M's dad lives in Moorhead, MN (about 3 hours northwest of where we live) but emailed me and told me he was going to be at a motorcycle rally in Iowa and would be passing through on Sunday on his way home. It worked out perfectly to surprise M with a birthday lunch with his dad. He had NO idea, I was very casual about everything... right up until I saw the motorcycle drive by the front of our house to head out back and park. M wasn't expecting anything so he didn't glance twice at it but I hopped up and began pacing as M's dad took FOREVER (it was probably 7 minutes but OMG I was jacked up) taking off all his cycle gear and coming inside. I honestly thought I was going to pass out I was so excited because I know how much M loves spending time with his dad. 

I opened the back door and motioned him in, but put my finger over my lips to tell him to not say anything.. and as we walked into the living room I said "Surprise #6 is here!" and the look on his face was PRICELESS. It was similar reaction to the surprise trip to Florida reveal. 

I had arranged for M's sister who lives in the cities to come to lunch, too and realized I never told M's dad about it, so that was a fun surprise for both of them when she showed up. His dad had told me he wanted to be "in and out" since he had a long drive in front of him so I picked a place nearby with fast service typically (Rojo at West End, for locals- again!). We got back home around 1:45 with plans to visit for a little bit when the guys realized the World Cup final was on at 2:00. Well, "in and out" slowly devolved into all 4 of us watching the final together (and when I say I watched I mean I watched the entire first half then napped through the second. woops). So, he hit the road later than expected but I know how much M loves watching sports with his dad, too.. so that was extra special. 

By the time his dad left we only had about 45 minutes until the 7th and final surprise of the weekend, which was going to be a casual surprise get together with some of his friends. Nothing huge, just about 12-14 of us in a back room at a local restaurant. Except, unfortunately 6 people bailed shortly before so it was a smaller group of 8 of us.. but it was almost preferable that way.. it was a small enough group that we all had one big conversation and it was an eclectic mix of his friends so it was nice to chat with people I sometimes wouldn't. We also got to hear some big news from 2 of his friends- they're 12 weeks along and expecting a baby in January! This is the first baby in a while, and they just got married in April 2013, so I'm excited to see the wave of kids start, now that almost everyone is married in the group! 

That was the last surprise of the day- after which we head home and watched more of The Wire- duh. 

I'd be remiss to not mention that it was also TJ's honorary birthday. We got him in late August and he was about 8 weeks old so we estimated his birthday back to be around early July. Since I was a bad cat-mom and spaced it until this past weekend, we celebrated tootie's birthday too. He's 3! So he was treated to some sloppy smelly wet food and just wolfed it down, squealing and purring the whole time- hilarious. 

It may have been M's birthday weekend but I had SO MUCH FUN planning it and enjoying all of it with him. I love doing things like this and I think he had a fantastic weekend. Make me want to plan weekends like this "just because" more often! 

RAIN RAIN GO AWAY

Hi, bad blogger here. Just stopping in to tell you as much.

Got soaked to the bone, despite the umbrella, walking from the car to work today. Just some casual hurricane strength rain. Barf.

Actually I'm dedicating an entire blog post to tell you that you NEED to click this link and make these burgers that Jess posted or should you die tomorrow your life will have been truly unfulfilled having not eaten these. SERIOUSLY.

mkay, have a good weekend! It's M's dirty-30 Sunday, so I've got a whole weekend of shenanigans planned. :)

SUNDAY CURRENTLY // VOL. 4

 R E A D I N G 

If I stay (and the sequel, Where She Went) for book club- a club that sort of impromptu started as a result of an Instagram photo but I hope we can keep it going! Last month we read Brain on Fire and even talked about the book for 20 minutes, which I really consider a success. ;-)

 L I S T E N I N G 

to TJ chewing on his toenails...and Dateline Mysteries is on in the background.

 T H I N K I N G 

It's high time I start really planning for both of our upcoming trips! We have a hotel for Rome, and hotels for Seattle/Tacoma, but I want to do more research on the "what" to do- I do have Italy pretty well scouted but there's always more to be done.

 W I S H I N G 

I had a laundry fairy. It's gotten to the point where my laundry is SO out of control it'll take about 3 loads to do so I avoid it and it mounts and really I just want to buy all new clothes and give up. I realize some of you are laughing at this because it doesn't sound like a lot... but M and I still do our own clothes and with no kids, typically laundry is 2 loads- 1 dark 1 light, sometimes even 1 when I mash them all in together and am lazy about it. But WOOF. Idontwannaaaaaa.

 L O V I N G 

Life, lately. It's been good. I've gotten a lot of alone time to recharge (see 'wanting' re: continual weekend abandonment by my husband.. ;-) -- spent a good amount of quality time with friends and have been content for the most part.

 W A N T I N G 

This week to fly by because THREE DAY WEEKEND. We're still debating our 4th plans. M's been out of town the last 2 weekends, and 2 other weekends prior to that over the last 2 months.. so he's trending more towards "stay home" where I, as the abandonee, would like to spend some time myself at the lake. The only catch is the lake we've been invited to typically turns into a "WOO HOO PARTY!" time.. which I'm not sure I'm up for. Although as far as I know we were the only couple invited up.. so we'll see. Maybe just for a night or two. Regardless, I'm looking forward to a long weekend.

 F E E L I N G 

Really grateful. Thursday the St. Paul Fire Department honored the 5 people who saved my dad's life. The ceremony was at the YMCA where it happened. I'm not sure what my dad and I were thinking, but we imagined a super small casual ceremony in the lobby of the YCMA. Wrong, so wrong. I walked into a conference room filled with about 20 people and 4 cameras that belonged to the local news station. The Pioneer Press did a write up on it, and he was on the 6:00 news. It makes sense, everybody loves a feel good story.. and it was fantastic PR for the Fire Department and the YMCA. Apparently St. Paul is the best place to have a heart attack/cardiac arrest, as they have one of the highest survival rates in the country. It was a really neat ceremony and I'm so glad I was able to be there.

The man in the blue polo next to my dad is actually one of my dad's closest friends. He was playing handball with him the morning it happened, and is the one that performed life-saving CPR. He's always been important to our family but there's really nothing I can do to express how thankful I am for him now.

Also, I learned, another man who performed CPR- in the long sleeved yellow button up- is a fire chief in Hudson, WI (former St. Paul fire chief). It scares me to think about but he said he hadn't been to the YCMA in the morning at that hour for months due to a new schedule. It really was a case of absolutely everything going perfectly as it needed to, to save my dad. Ack, OK I need to stop.

Some other weekend snaps:

CHECKING IN

Hola!

It appears to have been a little while and I could say things that bloggers say like sorry and I missed it but meh, let's get down to it. 

So what's been happening lately? 

 Well, for starters, M and I finally tackled one item from our spring to do list and painted the front of the house. 

As you'll recall it looked like this before:

 

I'll acknowledge it's not terribly offensive... but it was time to go. 

We talked in the original post about painting the entire exterior grey and then doing dark navy or dark grey accents with white trim. 

Then when I started to contemplate how much work painting the ENTIRE house would be I thought up a solution that involved only half the effort- let's start out and paint the trim white, the window boxes and triangle navy, and then add some navy shutters and see if the brown doesn't suck so hard. 

And wouldn't ya know, it did the trick: 

We got quite a few comments from neighbors during this project that led me to believe the red was not well liked. We left the door red because it's a really nice contrast when it's closed..and it sort of accidentally looks patriotic but not too chintzy (or so I hope).

If I took a photo of the side or back of the house or the garage you'd see our secret: so far we've only painted the front. It's easy to ignore the rest for now when the curb appeal looks so much better.

What else, I've been eating some insanely delicious (and easy) meals (click photos for recipes):

and lastly, but probably most excitingly, M and I have booked trips to these places:

{photo via; Michael Riffle}

{photo via}

{photo via}

{photo via- by MPearl}

so. freakin'. excited.

Needless to say things have been pretty good lately, overall.
Now, if you don't mind, I have a super needy kitty to snuggle, a hotel in Seattle to book, and some trashy TV to watch while listening to the rain.

WHAT NOT TO DO AT THE GYM

In honor of the fact that I actually dragged myself out of bed this morning to go to the gym (for some reason it's been terribly difficult lately) I thought I'd share this super helpful post I've had drafted.

It's called, what not to do at the gym (but perhaps not what you're expecting it to say):

1. DON'T BITCH ABOUT 'YOUR SPOT' IN GROUP FITNESS
For all you know the person 'taking your spot' has been TERRIFIED of participating in a group fitness class for this very reason and has been avoiding trying one out for weeks. They finally work up the courage and there's the know-it-all gym douche shooting them daggers for stealing their 'spot'- news flash, you don't own shit at the gym, let alone a spot.

2. (on a similar note): DON'T BITCH ABOUT PEOPLE WHO BUMP INTO YOU DURING ZUMBA/BARRE/WHAT-THE-F-EVER CLASS
Again, maybe this is their first class. Maybe you should cut people some slack. Maybe not everyone can hip thrust to the beat JUST.LIKE.YOU. Maybe you are the reason they're scared to try a group fitness class. Maybe you should get over yourself.

3. DON'T TALK SHIT ABOUT PEOPLE WHO TEXT ON WORKOUT EQUIPMENT
Maybe they're having a really awful day and needed to talk to someone about it. Maybe they're figuring out logistics for dinner with their husband. WHATEVER the reason, it DOES NOT AFFECT YOU- so stop being an asshole about it.

4. DON'T JUDGE PEOPLE WHO LEAVE THEIR HAIR DOWN
This could be the ONE DAY in their ENTIRE LIFE they forgot a hair binder, but you still take it upon yourself to judge them. Maybe they have a birthmark they're embarrassed of and don't want to put their hair up. Bottom line is- you don't know and again- IT DOESN'T AFFECT YOU.

5. DON'T JUDGE PEOPLE FOR WHAT THEY'RE WEARING
So sorry, don't have a trust fund, can't fucking afford a wardrobe packed with neon lululemon. Also, sorry if you think someone is wearing the "wrong type of top" to be wearing for running, I didn't know the gym had a wardrobe police.

6. DON'T TELL PEOPLE THEY'RE "DOING IT WRONG" IF THEY'RE NOT SWEATING
Sorry that you have out of control sweat glands.. but news flash: not EVERYONE sweats like a hog. This does not mean they aren't feeling it in their muscles or they're not working hard. Also, you have NO idea where they're at in their health journey, and you have NO idea how hard that "easy looking workout" may be for them. Come up with a better metric for measuring "gym success", gym douche.

7. COME JANUARY 1, DON'T LOUDLY PROCLAIM THAT YOU CAN'T WAIT UNTIL MARCH WHEN ALL THESE NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS "FALL OFF THE WAGON"
There's really not enough acceptable profanity to express how much I want to hold these people underwater when I hear this phrase. People are giving fitness an honest to god run during new years? GOOD FOR THEM. But you, gym douche.. you need to let everyone know YOU'VE been there since last summer. You work out 5 mornings a week and will be here in March when some people lose steam. YOU can go jump off a cliff.

8. (not "gym" related, but work out related): STOP CORRELATING WORKING OUT WITH, "BECAUSE, POOL SEASON!" 
News flash: not all women work out to look good in a bikini. I understand that's not the entire reason YOU even work out, so why are we perpetuating that stupid phrase? Want to know the number of times I find myself in a bikini for prolonged periods in the summer? Probably 5. Unless I happen to be at/near some kind of beach vacation. Even then. That was something I found far more common at 22, 23. At 27? Not so much. If you're 27+ and make that a priority? Great! I just don't find myself near water all that often. I work out to feel better, stronger, and oh yeah- because my dad had a major heart attack 6 months ago and the docs said it wasn't diet or exercise, it was his genes. Boom, genetic lottery. (Also, this is a shout out to the people who tell me "you don't even need to work out!" --- I didn't know heart attacks cared about your waistline...#weird).

This post was brought to you by the gym douches: self righteous bitches who lord their health and fitness over you, who act like they own the gym, who bitch about things that DO NOT AFFECT THEM. Am I a perfect gym goer? (WHAT?! You didn't know that I went to the gym about 3-4 times a week? Is it because I don't talk about it EVERY DAY? Weird.) NO. But I do my damndest not to side eye people exhibiting peculiar behavior (of which the bar is VERY high for me, since I am very peculiar) because I sympathize MORE with them, than the gym douche decked out in LuLu. (Obviously I know not everyone in lulu is a gym douche, I'm using it as an exhibit).

When I went to my first Barre Fusion class? I was TERRIFIED. I had SO MUCH anxiety about knowing what to do when I walked in the room, being in the right room, grabbing the right items. I actually got there 25 minutes early, thought I was at the wrong room, asked the help desk, and then THANK GOD set my mat down in the PERFECT spot where the bar was about to be set up so I actually don't think it was super obvious that it was my first class but I was SO scared. I know that sounds idiotic but do you want to know WHY? Because of all the bitches who have ever written a "what not to do at the gym" blog post, like they invented the idea of working out.

JUST STOP.

/end rant.

GUILT AND FEAR

My dad called the other night to ask me if I wanted to come over the following day to learn how to take care of his plants while he was gone.
I laughed and challenged him on the notion that watering plants was somehow a complicated task but more so understood it was an excuse to see me.
So when he finished telling me that his new "flower tower" actually DID require a tutorial and followed that sentiment up with, "I have some sad news about R.W." -- a name I'd come to learn in recent months since my dad's heart attack and my mom's passing- I wasn't prepared for his next statement.

Truth be told I'd only met him three times. The first, when he popped in after recess duty to say hi and offer condolences as we planned my mom's services in the conference room at the grade school. The second, at her funeral. The third was when he actually showed up to watch the Minnesota Gophers play in the NCAA championship hockey game. I say "actually" because my dad has this ridiculous quality about him where he throws out vague invitations, and unlike the intense type-A in me, never expects a firm RSVP. "You should stop by!" He says. So when M and I arrived that night to watch the game he told us there could be anywhere from zero additional people, to approximately 6. The game started and no one had showed up and my dad was a little disappointed.. the consummate host, he took it a little personally when people no-showed, despite having obtained no firm RSVP's. I still remember his excitement when he glanced outside and saw R.W.'s wife dropping him off with a bottle of whiskey and the note in his voice when he said "aww, it's R.W.!" R.W. was more quiet overall, but seemed comfortable and offered the odd commentary: he reminded me a lot of my dad.

So when my dad said "I have some sad news about R.W." my immediate thought was, "oh no, I bet he just got diagnosed with cancer." So I wasn't at all expecting to hear what he said next, "He had a massive heart attack and died last night. He and his wife were just biking and he fell over and they couldn't revive him."

My heart jumped into my throat because I understand all too well what separates a "he didn't make it" phone call from a "he's on his way to the hospital" phone call- the phone call I was lucky enough to receive last October: dumb. fucking. luck. That's it. I know it, my dad knows it, and that's why I heard all the things he didn't even have to say on the phone during that conversation, "that could have been me..that WAS me...why him...why not me..."-- and I know there are people reading this who live their lives every day knowing what it's like to be on the other side, the awful side, of that kind of luck. Thinking about that dumb luck paralyzes me, sometimes. That's because there are two great equalizers in life: guilt and fear.

I honestly didn't really even KNOW him, so I would hate for this to be construed as making it about me, but in some ways his death has me even more rattled than my mom's. I can picture him on the couch watching the game, hear his voice. It was SO recent. It seems both incredibly obvious and stupid to say this but the thing that shakes me most about death is that in the months, weeks, minutes before it happens - these people had no idea it was coming. I find myself mentally tracing back to that one second, that one decision, that could save them. This happens more notably for me when I hear of car accidents, someone steps off a corner and is struck and killed by a truck.. literally ONE SECOND could have saved their life. It seems as though we should be able to go back in time and fix it. It seems so fucking STUPID that such a blip on the radar in terms of time, can cost someone their life. The same can be said with things left to chance, as is often the case with a heart attack: the moment the blocked artery triggers cardiac arrest. What if it had happened at school? or any place with an AED?

I'm sure it's the oversaturation in the media but I find myself drawn to, and easily obsessed with, tragedy news stories. Shootings, car accidents, drownings,.. constantly cycling the "one second before/one second after" thoughts in my head. I know this is wholly unproductive and unhealthy, but it often has me wondering when (not IF, when) tragedy will strike me again personally. It feels like it's inevitable, and it terrifies me. Perhaps that's a sign I need to step away from the news..since some small logical part of my brain knows these are the exception, not the rule.

It's hard to find any deeper meaning for why my dad is here and R.W. isn't. I refuse to believe that was part of God's plan. I don't think God plans for anyone to die, or orchestrates it in any way. I do hope and pray that the fact that R.W. seemed to be a very devout catholic helps his family in the coming weeks and months. I'm sure this post sounds rambly and a touch self-centered at times but I'm not trying to make this about me. It naturally comes from my point of view as I process this but I really truly am devastated for his family, and my dad.. who has lost his wife and a friend who- from the sounds of it- he admired greatly, among some other scary family health news in the last few weeks.

There's no point to all of this, but I needed to put it out somewhere. Maybe I need to absolve myself of the guilt that it easily could have, should have probably, been my dad.

HOME AWAY FROM HOME

This post is sponsored by DogVacay.com, nothing was provided in return for this post, all opinions are my own. 

The meaning behind the phrase "home away from home" seems to be an obvious one, doesn't it?
It's a place that isn't home, but feels like home.
When I was contacted by DogVacay.com  to participate in their "home away from home" project I struggled a bit to come up with a place that truly stuck out as my number one. This was the case for many reasons, but I think the biggest one coincided with a line from their email, which read:

"sometimes, it just takes some good people, a great environment or a sense of comfort & familiarity"

One thing I've always prided myself on is my ability to adapt, so the truth is: I feel "home" a lot of places. Brunch wherever it is we happen to be dining that Saturday morning.. a coffee shop.. walking through the park or hiking (like we did this Memorial Day weekend!). However,  if pressed on one of my favorites, though... I'd have to say Naples, FL:

My aunt and uncle have a condo down there, so that definitely helps with the sense of comfort and familiarity.. but we've been down there a few times now and can now spot the "new" restaurants on 5th, have a favorite coffee shop, and have a bit of a routine when we head down.

I'm sad it didn't work out to get down there this winter, but it's nice to know we have a vacation spot that we love and are comfortable with just waiting for us to return.

So, what's the link between dogvacay.com and Florida?
I don't have a puppy (YET- M is a fuddy duddy on this topic) but I do understand the importance of creating an environment for a puppy that is comfortable and familiar. DogVacay offers you real pet sitters in your area- no cages, half the price of boarding costs, and your pup will be hanging out with a fellow dog lover. Can't think of any better "home away from home" for your furry family member.

It's definitely a service I'll be checking out when I have one of my own!

So, tell me- what's your home away from home?